Chillin in My Beamer

OK, I do not drive a BMW. But that song is n my mind right now. Possibly because that is the song that the big monkey is doing her hip hop routine to this weekend.

Also, I am catching up with my Millionaire Matchmaker episodes. Wow! What can I say. The men are misogynistic pigs. But then again, they have been trained that they can be, just like Pavlov's dogs. If they pull out the wad of cash, the 10s will come. They all say that they want "TRUE LOVE" but that they just can't find it. What they don't understand is that while women only "LOVE" them for their money, they only "LOVE" the women who are HOT!

How is it that these "entrepreneurs" that are pretty darn smart in their respective fields, are so dumb that they can't see the true problem?!?! They want a wife that is willing to love them for who they are as long as she is perfect in every way. If you've ever been married, you know that that is IMPOSSIBLE.

Patti, the host, CRACKS ME UP!!! In this episode she is talking about the petite little "spinner" - who spins on a guys lap. She must have said that phrase at least 10 times. Man, is that woman FUNNY!!

If you've never seen the show, give it a shot. In between the bouts of moral outrage and nausea most people feel upon first watching the show, you will probably find it pretty hilarious.

A calm night watching TV?

I was watching TV tonight, catching up on my trash TV. It's been a long week, and I have to work the weekend, so I decided to watch the 3 episodes of The Millionaire Matchmaker I had on my TIVO.

I vacillate between thinking that the woman is a COMPLETE psycho who gives real matchmakers and/or Jewish women a BAD NAME, and thinking she is actually telling the guys exactly how it is (go on girl!).

But tonight...she is clearly CLUELESS about at LEAST one thing. To quote Scandy, "she don't know nuthin' bout birthin' no babies!"!!

She was coaching a Female Millionaire who has a baby. Before she went on her date with a guy, Patty (the "Matchmaker") told this mom to put the baby (I think under 2 years old) to sleep at 7pm, the normal time kids go to sleep, and then relax and go to sleep early herself.

Hello??? 7pm??? I don't know about you all, but even if I "START" putting the monkeys down at 7pm, they will not fall asleep AT LEAST until 8pm or 9pm (we normally don't even START our routine until 8pm). And those hours between starting the bedtime routine and the monkey's falling sleep - anything but relaxing and restful!

This "Matchmaker" apparently thinks that raising children is just like doing it on TV - you hug them, kiss them and then wish them a good night and close the door. She does not realize that there is a constant barrage of "Mom, one more thing....I'm hungry...I'm thirsty...I need to go pee...I need to go pee again, and this time I really mean it...Mommy, I love you...and on and on and on"!

OK - rant over. Man, that felt good to get it off my chest. I tried finding a clip of this on YouTube but couldn't. If anyone finds it, please email me and I will revise this post :)